"Calm down" as a weapon and new Kundalini Yoga location

First, I’ll be teaching a four week session of Kundalini Yoga at ABC’s of Building Better Lives located at 5934 Old French Road on Tuesdays at 5:30, starting November 3rd. I am hoping the cost is inclusive, but if you need any help with that, please just contact me.

Details to the right obviously.

Second, a piece I wrote lately is one of my favorites. You can read the whole thing over on my stack but here’s a bit of it:

The other night I had a serious meltdown. If you want to call it that.

Let’s be more honest: I had a moment (and I have many of these) where my defenses melted down. The wall of calm could not hold and the truth of my anger and grief came spilling out. It’s powerful. Sometimes it does harm because holding all of that back creates so much pressure.

I had witnessed another woman’s pressure valve not working earlier in the day, and through her symptoms, I could see her truth and the truth of so many women who have lived before us:

We hold the pain of the people who cannot face it themselves.

We hold the fear of our younger selves.

And sometimes it’s too much. It should always be too much.

It made me think of one of my ancestors who was told to never have a baby again because her depression after a stillbirth almost took her. Instead of helping her, they told her to just stop and be calm.

They couldn’t tolerate her pain so they asked her to numb it.

I think of another ancestor who lived with so many layers of grief, starting when she was only two, that it would erupt like a volcano and it eventually landed in one of her daughters who landed in a hospital because of the pain of the holding.

And that is just a couple of examples from my own line.

I think of all of the women, one after another, back and back through time.

All the genius lost to just holding and staying calm.

All the genius lost to treatment and drugs — electro shock and laudanum and white rooms and eventual walks into water with rocks in our pockets or heads laid in gas ovens in pretty little kitchens.

Local/hybrid evening Peony Somatic Dance and local evening kundalini!

As I said previously, I’ll be adding more and more classes and workshops and opportunities to move in community over the coming weeks and months.

For October

Peony Somatic Dance will be offered locally (and you’ll get the address once you register; it’s near Liberty Plaza) but you can also take it online — live or via recording as usual.

This class will run on Thursdays from 5:45 to 6:45 PM starting on October 8th for four weeks.

More details (about arrival times whether on zoom or in person and everything else) and registration here.

And starting Monday, October 5th (4:30 to 5:30 PM) and Wednesday, October 7th (5:30 to 6:45 PM) you can now take Kundalini Yoga at Studio Surrender in downtown Erie!

The studio is BEAUTIFUL and large and just perfect. It will be my usual method of synthesizing other movement and yoga work into the Kundalini along with all the usual and wonderful breath work and great playlists of course.

Back to Erie and here come local classes!

There is no way to articulate the relief I feel being back in Erie. And through a bunch of wildly wonderful serendipities, Craig and the cats and I are in a house close to the neighborhood of my old house. It feels just right in the most Goldilocks way possible.

We got back on Monday, August 31st and moving has been exhausting, but what’s been even more exhausting has been my body releasing all the stress I’ve been carrying for a couple of years now. Though I think, really, the stress started to snowball when Peony left her fur suit five years ago this September 21st. Nothing felt right after that and that loss on top of not having my inner circles of nutbags and the lake … it was all too much. My mental health suffered more and more.

I worked ahead on projects so I could have two weeks clear of writing and teaching and I’ve been sleeping deeply and long and slowly unpacking but not too much. Craig is just now finishing his job in Columbus and will be here 100% as of this weekend. (He’s been back and forth a couple of times.)

Class updates

First, I am starting a September session of my morning shorter classes the week of September 14 (this coming week) and though that’s “online,” anyone in Erie can ask to join me in my space.

Second, I will be starting to teach two in person Kundalini yoga classes at a local studio in October. I’ll be sharing more information as that gets closer.

And third, I will be offering at least one in person Peony Somatic Dance class in October also. Just to get started. More information later this month.

Over the next few months, things will continue to build so keep an eye out here and on Facebook as usual.

And don’t forget that I have a FREE Substack, Gladiola. You don’t need an app; you can see it all via your browser. If you click on that and scroll down my main page, you’ll see more about this move and my reconnection to this place. You’ll also see a note about how much this move brought up layers of unhealed C-PTSD that I was shocked by, to say the least.

I’d love to see you or hear from you!

A wee story about kundalini's relationship to my somatic dance and some new videos

I’m going to say something that is not said enough: all of this stuff is made up. All of it. Someone moved around a bit and “found” these movements. These are not handed down to us from some god or found in some ancient manuscript. (And why are older things equated with “better” anyway?) So when we find out some random man (always a man) was actually a total dork (to put it kindly) that doesn’t mean the movements aren’t still effective. (I’m speaking here to some annoying crap that came out about the people who brought kundalini to the west.)

So here we are: my love of kundalini goes way back and I think it was the door that led to me returning to dance. (And a side note for those who might know what this means: I have never been a student of “kundalini yoga as taught by Yogi Bhajan.” I am not someone who likes prescribed sets that are treated as if they are magical or medical. I like to play. And I was lucky enough to find some teachers who were the same.)

My yoga journey told super fast

I started studying yoga for the same reason a lot of people did in the late 1990s: I was stressed and anxious and depressed and thought it might help. I saw it as a physical practice as most did at that time. (Eventually I dove into the spiritual and philosophical aspects and those have been more influential to my current work than any of the physical stuff.)

My very first yoga VHS (yes, I said that… VHS TAPE) was with Erich Schiffman. The one with Ali McGraw that I believe set the aesthetic for yoga videos for a long time to come. You can actually see it here.

I was in my late 20s when I started and ended up studying a wide variety of lineages, starting with Iyengar and then Integral, Kripalu, and Vinyasa, until I somehow, in my early 30s, found Kundalini yoga.

And that changed everything.

I would finish up a practice and actually feel like my mind was not the enemy. I would feel… elated. It didn’t last more than a few hours but that taste was enough to keep me going back for more.

The breathwork is so important in this practice that I tell new students, you can always stop the movement if you envision it and continue the breath practice. (Again, this is foundational to Peony Somatic Dance and shows up in every single class to this day.)

Kundalini has a dancerly feel to it and it gave me a sense of the possible joy of my body after decades of living detached from my body. It was enough that I was open to dancing when the moment finally presented itself.

These moments that save us? They can easily be missed if the ground has not been prepared.

Kundalini is a gateway or so I hope

I love kundalini for itself, but I have also always held this hope that people would do kundalini and then want more… more freedom, more self expression, more movement unique to their unique bodies.

It doesn’t always work that way and that’s okay. It’s okay to just love your kundalini practice (even though, if you take classes with me, I’ll sneak in a bunch of other stuff).

And for that reason, I’ve finally decided to offer more of this practice I love to the wider world and not just the students in my classes.

I’m starting a section on my YouTube channel that will be focused on this.

To begin, I’m sharing shorts that demonstrate the most essential kundalini movements — the ones that I think you could do every day for just a few minutes and you’d get a lot out of them.

Keep in mind, that an “advanced” kundalini practice is more about length spent practicing than some contortionist or gymnastics level postures. Though there aren’t really “postures” in this practice because it’s almost always moving.

I’m sharing one video right here but you can go to my YouTube channel and get more (and maybe subscribe so you get an alert when I post new things).

In the coming months, I’ll share breath practices and a series for each chakra. I’ll also be adding videos of chair based versions.

Volume up to hear the breath. This movement has made my core and back so strong. Just a minute of this a day will create changes.

Introducing quickie yoga for your neurospicy brain

Or rather, introducing a reframing of quickie yoga in a way that tells its story better. We’ve been doing this work all along but now I’ll be bringing it to the forefront. Go here to register for March.

As always, these classes can be done live or with the videos on your own. And this 30 minute quickie, focused format works, I think, really well on video.

As we focus on what I’m calling “STIM YOGA for your neurospicy brain”, we’ll be bringing in a lot of the usual suspects and then some: multiple lineages of yoga, basics from primal movement, basics from systems like tai chi, somatic movement, breath work to match it all, and anything else I happen to be learning and is floating my (brain) boat. ((ha))

This is for those of us who struggle with focus, inner balance, peace, and nervous systems that tend toward anxious. You know where to find me if you have any questions.

A bit of radiance

Today I started teaching a fresh online session of morning quickie kundalini, and as I was preparing, it hit me that I wanted to share a tiny reading at the beginning of class.

Then I realized… whoa, I haven’t even wanted to pick a reading for so long, much less read it aloud in class, thanks to the darkness of utter disbelief in anything but the material world that has been plaguing me for the last few years. (I wrote about my sudden release from depression related atheism in the previous post.)

This felt like a big deal… yet another layer of change or another layer of becoming myself again.

And when I was explaining this at the beginning of class, the glee with which long term students reacted to my little announcement confirmed my feeling that we’d all been missing this.

If you’ve been in classes with me, you know I select these randomly by letting the book fall open or having someone yell out a page number.

So here’s the one I read this morning. It’s from this book, which is one of my favorites ever.

Radiance Sutra #61

Adorable one,

Sit or lie down, completely immobile,
Beholding the cloudless sky —
Or if there are clouds, the sky beyond.

As vastness envelops you,
The body vanishes,
Thoughts forget to come.
In this moment,
You are the nature of the great sky.

Intro to Kundalini Workshop

This workshop will take place in 3D in Columbus, OH on Sunday, April 21, from 5 to 7 PM. But I’ll then be taking the material online so keep your eyes open for that. (And this workshop is great whether you’re just starting with Kundalini or want a refresher/deep dive into it.)

If you’re able to be in Columbus, go here to register.

I thought now would be a great time to re-tell the story of me and Kundalini and give you an idea of what a class with me can look like:

The Story of a Magpie Mind

My mind is a magpie, always collecting shiny bits wherever it comes across them, never settling, adding forever to its already full nest. My magpie mind never thinks, “Oh! that’s the perfect amount of shiny! I am done!” Nope. My magpie mind is always in flight, searching.

I used to think that was a bad thing and maybe some of you thought the same or were taught the same about your own magpie minds.

I used to think that was a bad thing, until I realized it’s simply… NOT.

My magpie mind is fucking delightful and my students are better off for it.

I never tire of learning. I never tire of experimenting. I never tire of pushing myself just that little bit more.

Because of this, I’ve always had a hard time describing the yoga I teach. It’s steeped in so many lineages and I pull in from so many teachers and sources that it would be impossible to list them all in one place.

But underneath it all, there is Kundalini yoga — just with a whole bunch of Christine sprinkles, which change from month to month and year to year.

Kundalini Saved My Life and Prepared Me to Return to Dance AND LIFE

That’s not an exaggeration. I was deep into a severe and life threatening and long term cycle of depression and anxiety. My willingness (and I have no idea where that came from!) to try yoga and then to try Kundalini did something magical to my brain.

The focus on breath work and the quick movements of Kundalini — rather than the stationary poses of more “mainstream” yoga — washed my brain in serious amounts of happy chemicals, and yes, that would go away mere hours after practice but it was enough that it stayed in my memory and made me go back again and again. The longer I practiced — over months and years — the longer the effects lasted after each session.

Eventually this all led to my healing experience on the dance floor at a friend’s wedding when I was 40. I would never ever have stepped onto that dance floor again if I hadn’t been prepared by my Kundalini practice.

So what the HECK is Kundalini with Christine?!

In my late 20s, I started where most people start with yoga or thereabouts: Iyengar yoga. From there, though, I quickly dove into many other lineages: Integral, Vinyasa, Kripalu, Ashtanga, Yin, Restorative…and more.

I’ve also taken time to really study breath (pranayama); I have resisted but finally gotten a handle on meditation practices; I am obsessed with mudras; I am equally as obsessed with chanting. (I’m really a natural Bhakti Yogi, if that means anything to you. If not, it means I’m naturally devotional.)

I’ve studied yoga philosophy with one of the most renowned teachers in the West.

And more recently, within the last few years, I’ve dived deeply into Tantra studies, the foundation of Kundalini Yoga.

I’m also certified from Kripalu in YogaDance and YogaDance for Special populations (people with Parkinson’s, etc., and those recovering from cancer). This form is very influential to all of my movement work.

To get a rounder sense of me: everything I have ever studied relative to movement informs my approach to Kundalini.

This includes but is not limited to: Japanese Butoh, modern dance, somatic therapies, trauma and body based psychotherapies, biomechanics, and I’m probably forgetting lots.

So WHAT Does a Class LOOK LIKE?!

That’s a great question because it’s always evolving, but you can bet on a few things happening every time:

First, there’s always a TON of circular movements because that’s what the body loves.

Second, there will be repetitive and very natural feeling movements blended into and with things you more easily recognize as “yoga,” BUT there will always be a way to find all of it in YOUR OWN BODY. I’m extra good at that. ((grin))

Third, there’s a major connection to the breath and a variety of breaths in a way that most of my students say they never experienced before. The breath is actually more important than the movements.

Fourth, you won’t feel like you’ve “exercised” like some yoga classes (though that’s not always bad); instead you’ll feel like you’ve participated in a ritual of healing and joy.

It's already October!

Which means we start a new 4 week session next week, Tuesday and Thursday, October 10th and 12th.

First, if you need these classes and find they are out of reach in terms of payment, please tell me. I am not owed any explanation; just let me know your need and we’ll get you in to class one way or another.

GO HERE TO REGSITER

As always, I want to remind you all that you don’t have to be live for any classes and that the videos remain available to you for the entire four weeks PLUS whatever time there is in between the end of that session and the start of the next. Usually that means you get at least an extra week to play with this material.

Quickies are based in Kundalini yoga but there’s all kinds of functional movement added in, and these (like all of my classes) can be done on any level. You could do everything I teach from a chair if need be.

Tuesday Peony is fundamentals and beyond. This is a great place to start if you’ve never taken a class with me.

Thursday Peony is based in Butoh and only recommended if you’ve taken at least one other class with me.

If you have any questions, just send me an email.