“It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”
That quote goes around all the time because it speaks to so many of us, but according to the Krishnamurit Foundation Trust, there’s no actual evidence that he ever said it. He did say things that boil down to this, though, including:
Is society healthy, that an individual should return to it? Has not society itself helped to make the individual unhealthy? Of course, the unhealthy must be made healthy, that goes without saying; but why should the individual adjust himself to an unhealthy society? If he is healthy, he will not be a part of it. Without first questioning the health of society, what is the good of helping misfits to conform to society?
And Henry Miller, who said he was very inspired by Krishnamurti, put it this way:
There is no salvation in becoming adapted to a world which is crazy.
Now that all of that nerd stuff is out of the way… ((ha))
The title of this piece came to me early Wednesday morning this week, as I awoke to another day feeling deep despair about the world and my place in it.
You know… those days when even the blue sky and sun and warm temperatures do not beckon. Those days when your body feels as though it’s made of lead and even the cat can tell so she settles on you for a long nap, purring and doing her best to help.
I have been limiting my news a bit. But it feels irresponsible to completely limit it. There are people suffering and there will be more.
The cruelty of this administration is breath-taking. The people who support it even more so.
It’s one thing for sociopaths to sociopath but to watch others cheer them on…
And so I wake up under the weight of that and then the rumination starts: how is there any space for the work I bring to this world in this particular world? How is it that every single thing that means anything to me and that I am good at — writing, poetry, singing, dancing, teaching somatic dance, creating art — how is it that in this world they are building, there really is so very little space for me?
And when I ask that question I am asking as a person who has paid her bills with those things that she loves for a very long time now. I am not a hobbyist. This is my Work, in that spiritual, capital W way and in the way of making money to help with the life Craig and I are building.
To feel this sense that my work will slowly slip away (as it has already started to do to some degree)… the despair over this is profound.
So my own loss plus the vile news that comes day after day after day, wave after wave, with no end in sight, and yes, I am depressed.
And see how it makes sense?
I’ve written about this before: if you already have a propensity toward depression from early life trauma, well, you’re pretty sure to be sinking into depression now as we are triggered by a cruel and punishing administration. Punishing in that anything not to their specific liking is designated as “bad.” (Familiar?)
I know that in order to fight back against all of this, we must maintain our hopeful energy and we must be able to fuel ourselves through love and beauty and joy.
But, my god… right now that feels like a lot to ask. So I have no answers and will continue to ask the questions.
What is my part in this? How can I maintain the work that’s important to me and others? What role can I play in the larger pictures? How can I fuel my own self in a way that allows me to continue?
I do not want to give the authoritarian/schnazis the “sad bodies” that French philosopher Deleuze speaks of but I also do not know how not to.